Qantas: A review

I need to start with two apologies. One is that I haven’t written in a long time and that is not excusable, maybe it’s because I haven’t been out and about for a while and part of that reason is GTA. The other is that this article is part rant so if you know me then this is nothing new…

I enjoyed reading about British Airways by Steph so I thought I would also contribute my 2 cents with a review of a Qantas flight I just had. But let’s rewind a little to ‘getting to’ the actual airport in the first place:

For the first time ever, I was late for my flight. This was both humiliating and career limiting as my boss had to check in for me and by the time I received my final call from my boss while on the airport shuttle, I had only 2 mins before they would close the gate and I would be stranded in Sydney and not in Perth where I needed to be. Things were not looking good, and it was raining, and the traffic was terrible, like wanting to pee but being nowhere near a restroom.

I actually am reserving the right at this moment to tell you that it wasn’t my fault as the Airport shuttle service decided that 4:30am would be the pickup time and that they would get my address wrong so 10 mins was wasted dicking around and then I had to sign a bunch of stuff about my return flight etc. before the driver would actually move off from my driveway. Usually 4:30am is sufficient to get to the airport in time for a 6:30am flight however this day combined with whatever the sky threw at me equaled to me running from one end of the terminal to my gate… on the other side of the terminal. I worked cardio properly that day and vowed that I needed to get my fitness sorted. Luckily I had an excellent pair of ECCO business shoes on so the run was actually pretty good and I wasn’t in pain from uncomfortable shoes at the slightest. In hindsight I think I looked 100% heroic with belt and laptop slip in arm and cabin bag in tow at full sprint wearing business gear, you should have been there you would have gasped at the manliness of it all. When I got there one of the female attendants on the flight was standing alone at the gate waiting for me and she even asked me if I was OK when I feigned gasping for breath like a dying man. She graciously helped me with my bag and we walked to the plane together and she stowed the bag when I got to my seat which happened to be in the emergency exit when I am sure I didn’t book it. So far so good, I was late and looking like a lunatic but was afforded every comfort like I was the first to get in. All the more sad when the news that morning was about Qantas sacking 1000 staff and in the red financially.

Now that I was on board and getting comfortable I got myself a Coke and relaxed, the food that morning was potato cake, scrambled eggs and a pear muffin with yoghurt and some water and tea, oh and apple juice with 4 tic tacs, it was a smorgasbord of food (ok that might be an exaggeration). The attendants serving were courteous and efficient and I got my food pretty much before everyone else and I had choice so being late wasn’t all bad, except for the death stares from everyone in business and first class (walk of shame anyone?).

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Potato cake was OK actually. Eggs were a bit bland and I only found the salt after I finished – my sleuthing skills are crap. Also spot the 4 tic-tacs.

Touchdown in Perth was seen to approximately 3.5 hours later through which I learned that the infotainment system was not very touch sensitive and the table you see before you in the image above  all folded out of the armrest . As it was partitioned into 2 halves the structure of the little table (only in the emergency rows) is a little weak and I was worried the whole time I had my 15″ Macbook Pro retina sitting on it (the Macbook not me) that it would collapse and my laptop would be damaged and I would not love it anymore.

All in all a comfortable flight with not too many disruptions via the announcements. I watched “The Crash Reel” a rather touching story of Kevin Pearce’s fall from snowboarding superstardom to traumatic brain injury (TBI) sufferer. As before touch control on the screens were not fantastic but that might be because I have dry hands. True/funny story, on the way back from Perth I was tapping slightly harder on the screen (this time behind another passenger) and I think I annoyed the heck out of her because the touches weren’t registering, I was very careful to press extra hard after that (and not tap hard – I’m not a toolbag… I think).

Getting back into Sydney was on Qantas again and the service was great. I managed to break the tab to open my can of Appletiser and got a replacement in a snap. Going home from the airport the shuttle service was once again shoddy by not turning up at the right time, not calling and then being late by which time I was already on the way home at 10pm from a 8:30pm landed flight, suggest you steer clear of this unless you plan to be late in which case maybe tell them you are on the earlier flight than you actually are and maybe you might be on time*.

*OK I might have had a bad run (2 trips) and I get that, I am sure you have had no problem with the airport mini-bus before right?

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